EFT Couples Therapy, Individual Therapy, Identity and Transition, Grief and Loss, Self-Esteem, Anxiety, Depression. Works with adults age 18+.

How I Work

As a young person, I wondered why people often seemed to bury painful emotions rather than talking about them openly. When I was 12, my parents divorced, and I remember being sent to a therapist to talk about the impact it was having on me.. There, I found a unique space—a sort of inner sanctum—in which openness and honesty were encouraged and nurtured. I never forgot the sense of magic and possibility I felt in that therapy room, and I feel honored to offer that same invitation to others.

I work with individuals and couples around relationship issues, life transitions, loss, grief, identity, self-esteem, relational trauma, personal empowerment, depression, and anxiety.

I use a trauma-informed approach to support my clients as they turn toward their fearful, hurt, and stuck places and painful ways of relating. I create a warm, safe, and non-judgmental environment for clients to bring hidden aspects of themselves into the light to be experienced and honored.

As a couples therapist, I support each client as well as the relationship itself. Clients who reach out for couples work often feel frustrated, hopeless, and alone with their painful patterns. I help couples move out of their negative cycles and open up clear channels of communication with one another. When differences arise, I provide validation and guidance for each member of the couple, enabling them to access and express their unmet fears, needs, and longings.

Education/Training

Masters in Integral Counseling Psychology – California Institute of Integral Studies

Bachelors in Arts – Harvard University

Externship and Core Skills Training in Emotionally Focused Couple’s Therapy (EFCT)

What Brings Me a Sense of Ease

During my first meditation retreat in college, I found a sense of homecoming in the peaceful stillness of silent meditation. I have a personal practice that I carry with me throughout my daily activities using self-compassion, self-inquiry, and the ever-present background of silence as my touchstones. I feel restored by quiet time, walks in nature with my dog, involvement in local groups, and close connections with friends and family.

EFT Couples Therapy, Individual Therapy, Identity and Transition, Grief and Loss, Self-Esteem, An... Read More

EFT for Couples, Grief and Suicide Loss, Loneliness, Boundaries, Childhood Trauma and Neglect, Identity Exploration, Processing Experiences Related to Oppression/Marginalization

Languages Spoken: English, German

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Working with Ellen

We need each other as human beings. So it hurts when we experience loss, loneliness, isolation, or marginalization. We don’t always ask for the transitions life hands us, and it is normal to struggle with unwanted or unanticipated change.

When we hurt, when we struggle, we also have an opportunity to look at how we respond. In therapy, we will look into your patterns of relating together – patterns of relating to yourself and to others. We start by making sure there is a good connection between us, so that you can feel safe to open up and share your world. As a bicultural, bilingual immigrant, I know what it’s like to feel that part of you does not fit. If there is one sentence that summarizes my approach to therapy, it’s “All of you is welcome here.” There is strength in how you learned to protect yourself and we will honor that together. It is vulnerable work to invite all of yourself to the table, especially your lonely, anxious, angry, self-critical or hurt parts. It is worth it though.To see what loving eyes have not yet seen, and to say what was once unsayable is nothing short of transformative. This is the road from shame to connection, self-empowerment, and ease. Whether it’s just the two of us, or you come with your partner or family, therapy can help you get unstuck and reconnect with who you are and who you love.

Of particular interest to me is working with individuals who have experienced relational trauma and/or who are exploring their identities – whether their gender or sexual identity, their role in their family or their social circle, or their cultural and social or political identity, especially in the context of immigration.

Education/Training

Masters in Counseling Psychology – California Institute of Integral Studies

Masters in Cultural Anthropology and Social Transformation (with a concentration in Gender, Ecology, and Society) – California Institute of Integral Studies

Bachelors in Cultural Anthropology - Mount Holyoke College

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) Externship and Core Skills Training

What brings Ellen a sense of ease

I absolutely love rock-climbing and go climbing 3-4 times per week. I love the combination of skill, stamina, and strength that is needed to send a route and it makes me feel like a badass to top out on an especially difficult climb. Climbing clears my head and helps me feel strong. I also love baking and really take my time with it – although the results may disappear quickly.

I feel at ease when spending quality time with loved ones, especially on walks or hikes.

EFT for Couples, Grief and Suicide Loss, Loneliness, Boundaries, Childhood Trauma and Neglect, Id... Read More

EFT Couples Therapy, Mindfulness, Anxiety, Insomnia, Adults, Midlife, Menopausal Women

How I Work

The fact that you’re here looking for a new therapist means that change is already happening on a deeper level. Signals that you may be hitting a block in the process and need support to find your way through it commonly show up as anxiety, insomnia, relationship distress, and repetitive thoughts and behaviors. Maybe you and your partner find yourself repeating the same tired fight. Maybe you’re thinking the same things over and over, unable to get out of your head; or repeatedly doing the same things that you don’t actually want to do anymore. Perhaps you are facing new challenges and realizing that your old coping skills aren’t as useful now.

I work with individuals and relationship pairs of all sorts to slow down and get to the heart of where compassionate attention is needed. Emotions, physical sensations, and even symptoms can all give vital information. Tuning into these important clues, rather than automatically trying to avoid or fix them, can open up a new realm of possibilities. The psyche, like the body, has an incredible ability to heal and to reconnect when given the right conditions.

I work in a direct, open way with clients, bringing humor and deep presence to the process. Everything that makes you feel safe, seen, and heard is welcome with me. Sometimes that looks a lot like a regular conversation, sometimes like risking bold new words for old scary places, and at other times like sitting quietly together to gently hold big feelings and experiences. The work we do together will grow and change as you do.

Insomnia and menopause are two areas of special focus. Where better than the safety of therapy to break the code of silence around menopause? Let’s talk about it, in all the ways it may be shaking up your (and your partner’s) life. Your experience is real. Menopause is a literally life-changing rite of passage that deserves care and attention. Couples therapy during this time can also help you stay connected through the rapid emotional, sexual, and life circumstance changes that happen for middle-aged people. I would love to help you come home to yourself and each other.

If you are reading this because you are having trouble sleeping, first let me say, “I’m sorry this is happening.” I know you might be the kind of person who tries really hard at things, and how frustrating this has been for you. I also know the sense of hopelessness that comes with chronic insomnia. Let me say next, “you are not broken. Your body does know how to sleep and I can help you.” Insomnia can be devastating, but it is also very treatable.

I am trained in CBT-I, a structured, science-backed treatment method. I will meet with you (or you and your partner) for six weeks and we will follow a system together that helps you to break the cycle of insomnia by making practical changes to thoughts and actions around sleep. I can’t guarantee that you’ll be sleeping normally after we finish the CBT-I (although research suggests you will be sleeping much better). What I can say with confidence is that you will either be sleeping well, or we will have a better sense of what may be driving the insomnia, and, if you wish, we can collaborate on a treatment plan for addressing those deeper drivers together. You are not alone and, if you’re ready, we can help you finally feel rested again.

No matter why you’re coming to therapy, determining the goals and other specifics of your treatment will be a collaborative effort. You are the expert on your unique experience in the world. We can go as fast or slow as feels right for you and we will keep it simple, always coming back to the truth of your experience in the present moment. What I bring to the table is experience helping clients from a wonderful diversity of ages, races, cultures, sexual orientations, and life experiences. There is nothing more important to me than helping you feel entirely welcomed during your time with me.

If you’d like to take the next step, I offer a 15-minute consult by phone to discuss what you’re looking for in therapy – even if you’re not quite sure yet – and if I might be the right person to help with that.

Education/Training

Masters in Counseling Psychology – Pacifica Graduate Institute

Doctorate in Biology of Vector-borne Diseases – University of California Davis

Bachelors in Economics – University of California Davis

Certified Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I) Practitioner

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) Externship

What Brings Sandra a Sense of Ease

I love spending time with old friends, dancing, the sound of rain and the smell of old books.

EFT Couples Therapy, Mindfulness, Anxiety, Insomnia, Adults, Midlife, Menopausal Women How I Wor... Read More